The Coveted Parking Space

Ah, the coveted parking space. This reference may be just as figurative as it is literal. A couple years ago, I noticed that certain grocery stores and retailers started setting aside convenient spaces for “New and Expectant Mothers.” I remember when these first started popping up, that I thought this was a really neat concept. As you approach the later months of pregnancy or have a wee little one with you on a shopping trip, it is really nice to not have to park in “Row 84” and walk so long to get to the store.

As neat and nice as I thought this parking gesture was on behalf of the retailers and grocers, I was also affected by it in another way. Every time I went to these shopping establishments, I would drive by the reserved for mommies spot (or walk by it after I parked my vehicle) and be reminded that I wasn’t in the club. Maybe I’m being a little dramatic and emotional here, but this is a place where I can put all my feelings, so I’m just expressing what I felt.

Did I ever peep a word of these feelings to anyone? No, not even to Mike. But I do recall feeling them to a minor extent when going to the store, which I did all the time. I didn’t want anyone to know I was having these feelings—about a sign none-the-less. Having them even made me feel a little silly. I’m a positive person and wouldn’t want to project any bad feelings towards “mommy signs.”—I just kept on that brave face that wouldn’t allow even allow those closest to me know that I even saw the parking space signs. Perhaps if I hadn’t experienced the female medical complications that I’d been through, these signs never would have even caught my attention.

The fact is that I began viewing them differently as I got used to them…and, perhaps more importantly, as we started the process to starting a family (the unconventional way). They went from being a constant reminder that I wasn’t pregnant and didn’t have a newborn to a source of motivation and something to positively strive to work towards. How could a sign that says “Reserved for Expectant and New Mothers” do all of this? Because as we started our procedures, I would walk past the sign and designated parking spaces 2-3 times weekly and it would remind me that I was on a mission to become a mom and it was my job to remain positive. I went from scampering past them, feeling a little deflated, to looking at them straight on saying in my head, “I’ll be parking there one day real soon. Just watch.”

It’s amazing how something so abstract, serving a completely different purpose, could become a constant motivating factor for me. Truthfully though, it did. Then, I got pregnant….and then we got past the point that we were in the major danger zone. I actually felt myself subconsciously start to pack a little smile every time I passed the reserved parking spaces. Then, I waited weeks (months), for my belly to show and for me to feel tired enough to not feel silly parking in one of these designated parking spots. That day was yesterday. The parking lot was packed. I was on my way home from work—and pretty darn tired. And I saw the empty “Reserved for Expecting & New Moms” Space and said, ya know what, its time to park there.

Me and my silly figurative victories! This post is all about me getting the coveted parking space. Not for the convenience of parking close to the store—but for me to finally realize, I’m close to being a mom. And so totally thrilled about it.