And now, our HOPE is here

Wow, and just like that, everthing comes full circle. Yesterday wasn't "Any Given Sunday." In fact, it was a life changing one. I woke up when my water broke-- there was no mistaking it. It was a classic example of "Water Breaking for Dummies," with no need to second guess-I even felt a pop. Suddenly, I realized that its go time. Along with this came the tsunami of emotions that I totally expected. I was super excited, a little spooked, very eager to see what the next 24 hours would bring us....as I knew the hours to come would be life changing in the most amazing way.

We called the doctor, who told me in his South African accent, "Well, Love, this is a good thing. Its time for you to head to the hospital." So, we got ourselves together and headed off to Hillcrest. We checked in calmly and they started to get us hooked up to monitoring equipment to see where we were. I was only 1 cm dilated, so it seemed as though it would be quite some time before our baby arrived, but at least my body had made progress. Yay! So my doctor decided to start me on Pitocin, as they didn't want my labor taking too long since I was now amniotic fluid was exiting etc.

My contractions started to really pick up-- and at this point, we hadn't had any type of medication. They wanted to see how the baby was handling contractions. Litle B's heartbeat looked very good, until a major contraction arrived, and then it dipped considerably. If this had begun to happen later in labor (i.e. when I was much more dilated), they wouldn't have been so concerned. But, we were in for a long labor...and Little B's heartrate dips increased as the contractions intensified. So, they took me off Pitocin, but the contractions really didn't cut back quickly.

Dr Peskin decided that the best thing for both Little B & I was to do a C-Section. There was no way for them to find out exactly why our baby's heartbeat was dropping, but that it was consisently happening and was causing some concern. The doctor told me "you've worked way to hard to get to this point--we are not going to prolong this or put stress on your baby's heart. Mike & I were totally on board with their decision.

So, we had to wait just a bit for our OR to be vacated and prepped, and then we were off. Mike was a champ, and I'll admit that I'm very proud of how I handled the situation. Although everything was happening quick quick and the scene could have been very emotionally charged, we were in a zone. The C-Section went well, even better than they anticipated as they worked with the incision of my previous surgery. And, well, before noon, our Stork Hopeful Status turned into Proud Parents.



Jack Ernest Foley arrived today at 11:54am via C-Section. He's doing just great and we're elated! He weighs 7lbs 12 oz and is 21 inches long..and now, he's just like any other baby that arrives in the world. He's no longer a donor-egg IVF baby, but rather "our baby"....and to see him and take in all of this is just amazing.

Some interesting notes about Jack's birthday: He shares his exact birthday (and borrowws his first name for his middle name) with his paternal grandfather. At about midway through our pregancy, we picked the middle name, Ernest, for a baby boy. He also shares the day of birth, the "23rd," with his two cousins on Kris's side of the family. Pretty cool.

So, our hope is now here, as our child is now with us. Thank you for being a part of this amazing journey. This whole experience is just further proof that hope is all around us---and in many times, comes from within us.

Love, Kris & Mike

Chillin at home...literally

I can't possibly understand why Little B doesn't seem to want to make an arrival. I just can't figure it out...

Its just gorgeous outside. True, its 19 degrees out and has been snowing all day, but it looks nice out. And they're only forcasting about a foot of snow in some areas up here today. Did I mention that our hospital is smack-dab in the middle of the snowbelt? So if we have 4 new inches of snow (and I think we already have 6, but who's counting), they probably have at least 10 at Hilcrest. Come on Little B, we can build snow angels if you get here soon. Kidding. Kidding. Baby's future favorite NFL team played last night, so he/she doesn't have to worry about interupting a game later this week. Little B is very considerate, you know.

So, I've made a list of REALLY GOOD REASONS for LITTLE B TO GET HERE:

1) I have these super cute Thanksgiving outfits for you to wear. You'll look adorable.

2) Your cousin Cameron is getting anxious to meet you and doesn't exactly understand why its taking you so long to arrive. She thought you should have arrived about 7 months ago. There are some other family members who are beginning to agree with her...like mommy, daddy, Aunt Lette....grandparents, family, friends.

3) Speaking of your Daddy, he and your Mommy are beginning to get a little bit stir crazy. We've been having a lot of fun around the house, but the weather is preventing us from going out much. Its really nice to have this time together-- we've been watching movies, Hmm, if you started to arrive, that would be the most perfect reason for us to head out of the house for the hospital.

4) Your pet, Boomer, is getting confused. We've been hanging out with him round the clock for the past couple of days, and he's beginning to look at us a little funny. As if to say, "this is nice, but shouldn't you all be working or doing something so that I can continue to get my plethora of bones?" We keep telling him that he's going to have a new friend (and future Pez Dispenser once eating in a high chair) soon. You'll soon learn that the quickest way to this puppy's heart is through his stomache. You're going to be his favorite in no time once you start eating solid foods.

5) We have Christmas presents ready for you...in fact, they are already wrapped. Yes, that's what I did yesterday after I reorganized the pantry. There has never been a time when I've had Christmas shopping done by Thanksgiving, let alone have some of it wrapped already.

6) A whole lot of family is about to arrive here next week. And each one of them is very very very eager to meet you. And by the word "very," I mean extremely eager to meet you. There will be many hands to hold you and smiles coming. Knowing both of your grandmothers very well, there will also be an occasional photo taken of you too.

7) I'm about two days away from trying to start a brand new home improvement project. The runner on the steps will be done and fully installed today, and after that, knowing my nesting instincts, I'm abot 48 hours away from the big time impulse to start another one. Lets not go there...because I'm running out of "smaller" projects, meaning that knocking out a wall might be my next urge. For the sake of your future home, which we both happen to like a lot, please get here soon.

8) Have you heard how good Nonna G's turkey, Grandma Jo's apple pie, and Aunt Collette's mac & cheese are? Granted, you won't be eating them, but I would really like to enjoy them at home....not at the hospital. They're really good. And in your case, the aromas of the food are also delightful. Lets try to be home by Turkey Day, okay? If not, its not a biggie, but if I had a preference, it'd be to spend Thanksgiving here at the house.

9) We have toys, books, play mats, bouncey chairs, bassinets, a playyard, rattles, snuggly blankets (Boomer will explain how wonderful blankets are as soon as you get here), rattles, mobiles, stuffed animals, and really cute clothes for you. They're all here and ready for you. Everyone has been so nice with giving such nice gifts-- and they're all for you. Its incredible. You won't appreciate all of them until you get a bit older, but if I were a baby, I'd be pumped looking around this place.

10) The biggest reason for your quick arrival is that we just want to meet you. We want to get to know your face and want you to know us. We want to hold you and see that you are just fine. We want to make silly faces at you. We want to watch you sleep and then watch in awe as you wake up. We want to introduce you to the wonderful people around us, who will be a big part of your world.

So there's the list. Part funny. Part really sincere. When we woke up this morning, Mike said to me, well, we're only 2 days away from Monday....and that means we're really close to meeting you :) That's a great thing. However, if you want to come on your own this weekend, we'd be just fine with your decision!

Can someone please get Little B a GPS?

Dearest Gertrude,
I'm kidding. I won't name Little B Gertrude, even though it appears that Little B won't be arriving by midnight tomorrow. Turns out the baby is dealing with some faulty directions. We're back home and I'll explain what has transpired. But first, the most important thing to know is that the baby is doing well and is healthy--that's all that really matters.

We had our appointment today and we were all ready to go. Consistent contractions? Check. Bags packed? Check. Vehicle gassed up? Check. Check. Even the nurses who'd helped me over the phone yesterday thought that today was the day for us to have our baby. We were almost too ready...we even remembered to stop and get breakfast on the way to the appointment so that I would have something in my stomache before the stopped me from being able to eat/drink once admitted. Trust me, I'm not this well organized, especially with "Baby Brain" as my brother calls it.

So, I was pretty confident that today or tomorrow would be the day Little B arrived. In walks my doctor to "survey the situation" as we'll call it. The first thing he tells me is that the baby is in great health. And I could just sense the biggest "but" coming my way...and I was right. "But, you haven't made any physical progress since I last saw you. In fact, the baby is actually HIGHER than they were on Friday. You're having consistent contractions, but they aren't moving the baby downward at all. In fact, they're pushing the baby in a bit of the wrong direction." Seriously? My uterus is directionally challenged?!?! IS that possible? Apparently, the answer is yes.

Loverly. Again, we need to focus on the fact that even though Little B isn't here yet...he or she has a great heartbeat, is moving around a ton, and seems to be in the best of health, We just may have a problem with directions. Babies aren't supposed to rise at the end of a pregnancy, they are supposed to drop.

So, what do we do? They want to wait just a little longer to see if my contractions begin to push the baby down as opposed to up. In some circumstances, this can happen as labor progresses. So, I'm sending mental messages to my belly explaining that it is not physically possible for the baby to come out my nose, so in the words of the terribly cheesey "Charlie Brown Song"..."Reverse! Reverse! Take it back down now..." My doctor was very honest with me on exactly how high up my baby is, so we're not sure if this will correct itself on its own, or cause us to go to Delivery Plan B or C. He literally said "I'm not sure this kid is ever going to figure out how to get out on its own...they're that high up and nowhere close to the birth canal. Otherwise, with the contractions you're having, you'd be holding them by now." But, he did say that we should give it until Monday before we took action.

As for the action plan-- here's where it stands: They've scheduled me for an 8am Fetal Non Stress Test to assess how Little B's heart rate responds to contractions. The test should take about 30 minutes and the results will be given to my doctor immediately. From there we'll make a decision on how to proceed. When contractions occur, a baby's heart rate will suppress a bit. It should then quickly recover back to a normal rate. That's what we're looking to see happen. If the results come back showing that Little B's heart rate recovers well after a contraction, we'll proceed to the hospital to be induced at 9a. They are hoping that with medication, they'll be able to control contractions and help Little B descend properly. If the NST shows that the baby recovers from contractions a bit slower than they'd like to see, we'll go to Plan C, which is a C-Section. Because of my previous surgery, it wouldn't be a typical C-Section, but rather a vertical one. Without going into too much detail, it could be a bit complicated and the recovery would most likely be longer than typical with caesarians. But, whatever it takes to keep Little B safe, we'll do.

So, now we wait for Monday. If someone can get Little B a GPS, that would be great. Its possible that I could go into the right kind of labor (i.e contractions pushing baby in the right direction) before then, but I don't expect this will be the case. In all seriousness, we're staying focused on the baby being healthy, which is what today confirmed. Yes, I would be so happy to be at the hospital getting ready to welcome our baby in the way I envisioned. Just because its going to most likely happen a bit differently, won't change the end result. And that's all we really care about.

Looking Back Before We Leap into Parenthood

Over the past couple of days, both Mike & I have gone back and read this site from start to finish. I am so glad that we decided to record our thoughts and experiences here. There are little details that I'd forgotten about and emotions that I wrote about that I could have accidentally not remembered without writing them here. Anyway, reading back through this has caused a lot of thoughts to run through my mind, so I thought I'd share...

First, I'm in awe that we could leave our house today as we head out to my doctor's appointment and the next time we enter it, have a baby with us. Wow. I don't want to get too far ahead of us, but this is a real possibility. We're about to become parents. No matter what challenges we face as we raise this child, and I'm well aware that its going to be a whole new world, we will always be thankful for being able to enter into it. I'm sure this is a feeling that all "about-to-be-parents" experience.

I'm really glad we did a ton of research and put a lot of time into finding what we affectionately call "Team Stork." From finding the right donor agency to guide us into the donor egg IVF process to choosing the right specialist to do the IVF procedure and then transferring our care to an OB/GYN in Cleveland that we couldn't be more comfortable with...making the right choices has been a crucial part of this journey. Ann, Dr Hoffmann, Lisa, Bethany, & Dr Peskin...they have really made all of this possible and the whole process, although intense at times, very managable. Little did we know that our medical situation would take us back to Cincinnati! From start to finish, we couldn't have picked a better team.

Any tiny concern I may have had at early in the planning of this process about my ability to bond with a child who's DNA is not my exact own is gone. Eggs don't make you a mom. And eggs alone wouldn't create or grow a child in utero either. When combined with other crucial components, they offer the opportunity to enter into parenthood. Its what you do from there that determines the kind of parent that you become. The sense of connection I feel, even before meeting Little B, is stronger than I ever could have imagined.

Sometimes certain situations, both happy and trying, present themselves that allow you to see the true intensity of your partnership with another person. This happened to us in May of 2002 with the ovarian tumors we encountered. That was a bit of a scary time, but looking back at it, I choose to remember it fron another perspective. It brought Mike & I together in a way that still marvels me. Just like any other relationship, there's no such thing as perfect, but there are amazing relationships-- and that's what I feel we've created. We had a road to choose: We could be devastated because my DNA wouldn't be carried on in a typical way, making our road to parenthood a little longer and possibly a bit more complicated than we would have liked. Or, we could be hopeful that medical advnaces would allow us to become parents in our own way. We choose hope, and really, never looked back. Mike's strength then to stand by me, hold me up when I needed it, and encourage me to look at our situation optimistically is one of the things I love most about him. Behind the laid-back, happy, fun-loving, sports fanatic friend that he is to many, he's also an amazing pillar of strength and maturity.

The fact of the matter is that every couple, every team, every person will go through tough times in their life. We all have our own trials that require us to find strength and courage within ourselves to allow us to perservere. I personally feel that its much easier to persererve with a little positivity on your side than without. And, a lot of our ability to be positive comes from within us as well as from the people we allow to be close to us, in good times and bad. No matter how hard it may feel to call upon hope during a hard time, it can be found just about anywhere if you seek it out. Now, we're about to embark in another encounter, a very happy one, that will help us grow even more as a team.

I barely remember the shots and any minorly unpleasant procedures that used to freak me out. In fact, when I was on a cleaning/nesting spree, I threw out some of the extra supplies from the early parts of this process. I looked at them and actually smiled. Afterall, even if I wasn't particularly fond of them initially, they kinda got us here.

I'm so glad that we were open about all of this. From the very beginning, 6+ years ago, we didn't hide this from those close to us. Instead, we embraced the support of family and close friends. I can't explain the power and supportive foundation that emerged from this. We really need to thank everyone....from our parents & siblings, to our extended families, to our close friends - we're so lucky to have you in our lives.

We're proud of how we got here. From working hard in our careers so we could save for this, to being emotionally prepared to welcome Little B into our world. We're planning on having this website printed out as a keepsake for Little B and for us. At the right time, we will go through it with him or her to explain how they came to be. A big part of me really looks forward to the day we do this. No matter how the conversation goes, Little B will know that they are an amazing gift and have been surrounded by many wonderful people, even before they arrived. There is also a wonderful children's book, called "Butterflies & Magical Wings" by Amy Margolis, that we've read and have purchased for Little B. It explains the "gifts" (butterfly spots) that individuals can give eachother to help create new life (a new butterfly with magical wings that aren't neccessarily identical with their parent's spots, but just as beautiful). Its a nice way to explain the gift of IVF to a child without getting into the medical aspects that might be hard to understand. It focuses on the love, hope and "can do" attitude behind all of it. This story is not just good for kids-- adults can learn from it and be grounded by it too.

Okay, I've managed to get all these thoughts on paper...so now its time to try to nap. Hoping to meet this little one today or tomorrow (Or Gurdy/Gertrude it is.... Kidding)

p.s...As I finished up writing this, no joke, two deer came walking up in our backyard...the little winter wonderland I wrote about yesterday :). They just kind of hung around, but all I saw while looking out the big windows in the back of our house the two of them. As I watched them for a bit and as they moved about our property, a smaller, younger deer appeared behind them. Kinda cool. Hmmm....

Our little winter wonderland

Remember how I said I was going to be going into work today? Well, I didn't end up doing so. I woke up at about 4:30am with some consistent, yet decently spaced out contractions. I got up and walked around, then took a long shower, then laid back down. The contractions really didn't change. Early this morning, they were coming about 12 minutes apart. Keep in mind though that although they have been consistent, they are not painful...so these are clearly the early ones. So, it makes you wonder if this is false labor or very early labor. The truth is that its really hard to tell until you're looking back at it all (either still waiting to hold your baby or actually cuddling with them as they've arrived within 48 hours or so etc).

By 9a, they started hovering around 10 minutes apart, so I called my doctor to let them know. They've been very, very, very calm and helpful all day. They agreed that I should stay home with someone (Mike is here) and wait to see how things progress. Many times, this is exactly the type of slow progressing labor that they like to see...especially with women expecting their first child. So, that's what we've been doing all day. Its been snowing-- creating a rather peaceful scene. We went to the mall to get in a bunch of walking to keep things going. We grabbed lunch and did some more holiday shopping--- we're almost all done, which is a record for me. Mike got a haircut. I think we now have explored every inch of Southpark Mall. I'm also certain that Mike has spent more time in the mall over the past 3 weeks than he has cumulatively in his entire life.


Then we headed back home and have spent the afternoon relaxing. Our bags are packed-- even one for Little B. Our house is adequately straightened up. Boomer is totaly confused...he can't understand why there are packed bags and yet we're all just lounging around here. He doesn't seem to mind the extra cuddling and company. We've spent the afternoon in the great room, listening to music while reading. The view out the window is just beautiful...a little winter wonderland that is surprisingly calming---even though we may have to drive through it to get to the hospital....but up here, you really don't need to worry about the roads. They do just a wonderful job clearing them.

At our doctor's request, we checked back in with them around 4p. By then, my contractions really hadn't sped up too much-- we've been hovering around 9 minutes apart. The nurse practioner said this is really good. Slow, steady and consistent progress is ideal. With each one, just the right amount of headway gets made without stressing out me or Little B too much. She mentioned that this could go on for 24 hours or more, so we're most likely going to be staying home tonight. In my opinion (not that I have any experience :P, but...), its much better to go through this stage at home as opposed to in a hospital room that can end up feeling like a cage by the end of all this. Obviously, if I start to feel painful contractions or experience any of the other items on the "Call your OB/GYN When _______" List, we're to call the doctor on call and get instructions from them.

As much as we can't wait to meet Little B, we're both amazingly calm about all of this. We don't want to rush the baby here and am actually glad that progress is being made in this manner. I have an appointment tomorrow at 11a, so if things don't move into "go-mode" status tonight (and my gut is telling me they wont overnight), then we'll definitely have news then. Here are some photos from today...

Monday Morning Conversations

So, I went into work today. On Friday, after my appointment, we (meaning me, Mike, my doctor, my friends, family, co-workers, the free world etc) all thought that it was 50/50 at best as to whether or not I'd be in the office today. I really thought Little B would be here by today, but that's not the case. So, in to work I went. Even though I'm tired, I couldn't see myself sitting around. So, why not try to be productive?

Upon seeing me at work, the conversations, that literally repeated over and over (almost verbatum- no joke), were as follows:
"You're still here?!?"
"I thought you were gonna have that baby already!"
"What are you doing here?"
"Seriously, I can't believe you're here."

Tiffany, one of my work friends who had a baby just a couple of months ago, could totally relate to this type of morning. Her son was late, so just like me, she combatted the unintentionally exhausting arsenol of "how are you still pregnant" comments. In fact, she came by my office to do her personal rendition of the dramatic & sarcastic interpretation montage of all of the above comments. It was hilarious....and so on target.

It turned out to be a crazy busy day at work-- I didn't get home until 7pm. But, it did have its fun points-- like people wishing me well and my two super close pals, Sharon & Roger treating me to lunch. So nice of them. I plan on going in tomorrow for the morning, but taking a half day and temporarily hanging up the manager hat for a few months. If nothing happens in the next day, I have my next doctor's appointment on Wednesday at 11:20. I'm hoping that from that appt we somehow end up at the hospital. :)

As for other revelations today...as I woke up this morning, and saw snow, I thought this was a good omen. Afterall, I was born in the middle of a big time blizzard. Murphys Law would suggest that the addition of a small potential obstacle, such as a snowstorm, a hospital located 40 minutes away on a good day, and such a dwelling to be right smack dab in the middle of northeast Ohio's biggest snowbelt would bode well. Its really supposed to snow tomorrow, so maybe that's when Little B will decide the time is just right.

When I got into my Jeep, I realized that there was an infant seat securely fastened into the backseat. We did that yesterday, but I'd forgotten it was there until I saw it again this morning. That was kinda cool. Now, everytime I walk up to my car, I giggle a little bit to myself-- as its exciting to be so close. Speaking of so close, I also found myself having a little heart-to-heart with Little B while driving to work. It went something like this: "Its really time for you to get here already. I want to meet you and am trying to be patient, but come on. Get here. If you arrive by Thursday at midnight, I promise not to name you Gertrude. Thats a name that we may choose for you if you're a boy or a girl, should you not arrive by Friday, so its your call. My advise would be to pack up your bags and head down to checkout from Club Med to avoid such a name, but that's just me." Its never too soon to learn cause and effect relationships, right? Nothing against the name Gertrude, but I'm confident that my message was heard loud and clear by Little B. And if she/he knows best, she'll hurry up and get here very soon....if not to meet us, to avoid us calling him/her "Gerdy" as a nick name. And between us, Gertrude isn't at all a front runner in the name department, but shh, don't tell Little B.

Predictions

We're still spending time at home...doing our Sunday ritual of football watching, with all the associated highs and lows. The Bengals tied today...something that isn't very common at all in football. So, I guess technically, this means they are still on a winning streak (or a non-loosing streak) this week. What a season... not.

As for Little B, well, he or she is still hanging out in Hotel W and seems pretty darn content to be there. Every now and then we notice something that could mean something....and then that something goes away. That kinda summarizes the last 48 hours. We're just waiting, with no real news to report. Surprisingly, I've been able to sleep pretty well this weekend, so that's been very much appreciated. We'll see what tomorrow brings. And if tomorrow doesn't bring the news we're all eager to have happen, then we'll wait for Tuesday. See how patient I'm being?!?!? Tick, tick-tick, tick-tick....

In the meantime, here are the summaries of the predictions that were loaded into the site. Some of you are still in the hunt in the date category....and everyone's still in the hunt for time, weight, height and that other important one: boy or girl. We'll see who's overall prediction ends up being the closest.

PREDICTIONS

Mike's Prediction: Little B will be born on NOV 17th @ 10:13am, weighing 7 lbs, 6 oz and 21 inches long.

Kris's Prediction: Little B will be born on NOV 18th at 7:18 pm, weighing 7lbs 3 oz and being 20.5 inches long (Remember, Mike &I have decided that neither one of us is going to make a prediction on whether Little B is a girl or boy....we just don't want it to appear as if we're pulling for one or the other. It'll be a great surprise either way :)

Mom (Mamma Jo): Boy, Nov 17th @2:22 am, 7 lbs 12 oz, 21 and 1/2 in

Dad: Boy, 11-19-08 @ 9:55 a.m., 21 in, 7 lbs

Nonna G: Boy, November 11th (although her birthday is on 11/27th, so that could have been a fun date to share with a grandchild , 7.8 oz. 21 inches

Kevin: Girl, 11/16 @ 3:30 am, 7 lb. 3 oz, 20.25 inches

Collette: Girl (for Cameron's sake), November 15 @ 5 am, weighing 7 lbs. 6 oz, 21 inches long

Calvin: Boy, November 12 @ 3pm, 8 lbs. 2 oz., 20.5 inches

Cameron: Girl (BTW, she's been hoping for a girl since she found out there was a baby in my belly :), 11/13 @ 12:01 am, 7lbs., 22 inches

Amy Kelley: Boy, Nov.15th, 7 lbs 15 oz, 20 in.

Jason: Boy, November 10th, 7lbs 12oz, 22 in.

Jenn: Girl, Nov. 16th @ 9:30 pm, 6 lbs. 14 oz., 20.5 inches long

Andy: Boy, Nov. 12th @ 7:14 pm; 7 lbs. 3 oz., 20 inches long

Amy Karabaic: Girl, Nov 14, 7lbs 6 oz. 20in

Brad: Boy, Nov 15, 7lbs 5oz, 20.5 in

Kristen: Boy, Nov 10th, 8lbs 5oz

Making the most of a rainy Saturday

We've spent the day running errands...half in an attempt to actually accomplish things and half to walk around as much as we can....something that sometimes help keep the "get here baby" process moving in the right direction.

So, off to the mall we went. First, we grabbed lunch. Then we walked around and did some Christmas shopping...just like last weekend. We even got some funny phone calls while stolling through the mall. The funniest one was from Collette & Calvin. I had just spoken to Kev & Cameron, who were on their way to a birthday party and thanks us for "cooperating" with their plans so they could go see one of Kev's longtime friends whose daughter was having a bday party. Then, Collette & Calvin called....and they told me to put the phone on my belly. I laughed and told Calvin that I was playing along. Then he screamed into the phone "BABY, WAKE UP!!!" Hilarious.

We also spoke with my mom and Mike's mom, letting them know that nothing particularly interesting seemed to be happening today. But that's okay. I can feel that progress is being made and see the light at the end of the tunnel. If I do make it to my next doctor's appointment, it will be on Wednesday. At this point, because I've made "serious progress" (his words, not mine)in the past week, they plan on beginning with some minimal levels of medication that should help progress the labor process. Then, later that day, they'd send us to the hospital for an anticipated delivery sometime on Thursday. So, although he thinks he'll see me before Wed's appointment, I can see the light if Little B decides to lolly gag :)

While walking around, I did have contractions that were coming about 11 minutes apart for about 45 minutes, so we began to think "hmmmmm." But then they stopped. Still, with every one of those things, Little B apparently makes headway. So as long as they are happening, I'm a happy camper (not neccessarily a comfortable camper, but a happy on all the less).

After the mall, we went to the Sprint Store (Mike's phone needed and service upgrade) and then picked up the conversion kit and bed rails for our crib. We obviously won't need those for awhile, but they were backordered when we purchased the set and recently arrived, so we thought we'd pick them up since we were nearby.

I'm about ready to take a nap. Its a bit dreary and yucko out, so its the perfect day to lay low for a bit....especially after 4 1/2 hours of running around. Then, later tonight, we're meeting our friends, Amy & Brad for dinner at a Thai restaurant. I'm going for extra spicey! :) It'll be nice to spend time with them. That's our day. I don't think we'll be ending up at Hillcrest Hospital tonight, but who knows. I'm just happy that the discussions about me being the stuffed bird at Thanksgiving have ceased. I'll save that for the turkey.

Finally!

So, here's the scoop from today's doctors appt....

Turns out I was having some "possibly not fake like I thought" contractions. In fact, they decided to have me stick around to "watch" me because during my appt, my doctor noticed that there was definitely some contracting going on. I had four actual contractions in a litle over an hour. See, I've been callling these Braxton Hicks contractions because they really haven't hurt like I thought contractions would hurt. Everyone tells me "you'll know when you're in labor" etc. Anyway, I told him that I felt "cramping" during them, but not "all out pain that I'd expect to feel." He said that as they progress, they'll hurt more, but they are showing to be happening on somewhat of a regular basis, so these aren't fake ones-- I may just have a decent threshold for pain (so he says). Just wait til I wig out when in delivery and he sees what a whimp I really am!

Anyway, I have showed changes since my last visit. Thank G-D! Altough I'm not dilating, I'm making significant progress in other physical ways (not going into details-- just take my and my doc's word for it). He said the dilating part they can work on....its the other things that are happening that matter for Little B to get here. And they're in the works.

He said we're aren't far away at all. He also said he "didn't want to jinx me, so told me to go ahead and schedule an appointment for Wed, but that he fully expects to see me before then"...and that's a direct quote. AMEN! We then went through the "call me when" list...with one slight deviation: "if those 'fake contractions' that you think you're having start to come every 8 minutes with or without the pain level you think you should be experiencing, you call me. I don't want to put your husband through uneccessary stress. And a bit of advice, tell him to make sure he gasses up the car on the way home from work-- you'd be surprised the conversations that occur in L&D rooms when that doesn't happen."

So, we'll see. I'm just so glad that I didn't hear the same "not seeing any changes" message again this week-- in fact, the news was much different. We actually seem to be making big progress. Fingers crossed!

And Peapod Tracker Says....

...40 Weeks Pregnant. Notice that the makers of the tracker are very kind in terms of automatically removing the "Only ____ Days To Go." That's very nice of them. Well, guess this means we're here...well sort of. Its safe to say that no matter what, Little B will be here within the next 2 weeks (and I'm hoping its closer to "next week" than the 2nd week). So, instead of being glum that my due date is here, and my baby isn't yet, I'm going to look at this from a positive perspective...at least for the next 24 hours...HA!

In honor of hitting the 40 week mark, we took some pix this morning....so, here's the bump (and the fake, "I kinda fee like dork posing like this and oh, by the way its early" smile). But, it is a coveted bump shot, which I've been asked by some to post, so here goes. Me at 40 weeks. Another bright note is that my mom can finally post a comment like "you look pregnant"...because everytime I've sent her a photo, I get the response "you don't even look pregnant" or some variation back. There's no denying it here. YAY!

Tomorrow I get to see my doctor...I'm not sure if its "real," or "all in my head," or "me trying to call upon the power of positive thinking" or some combination of the three, but I feel like there should be some sign of "progress" at my appointment tomorrow. We'll see!!!

p.s. Thanks to everyone who let me borrow clothes-- this outfit is courtesy of Amy. You ladies saved me tons :)

From Little B (through a great comment posted yesterday)

Seems like Little B is very advanced and can even write! :) The following was posted in a comment from yesterday's "High Alert" post, regarding the top reasons that Little B is quite content to remain in Hotel W as long as possible. I thought it was so clever, so here it is! Enjoy! -Kris

TOP 10 REASONS WHY LITTLE B IS PONDERING THE EVENT:

10) mmmm what do you mean i cant stay here for good?

9) Cant decide on my hairstyle and outfit to wear for the big exit.

8) Wait a second, there are NO outfits in here and i am shy! The first thing they are going to look at, you know????

7) Now i can kick all i want and get smiled at, later wont be quite so forgivable or amusing!

6) I love swimming and this is really relaxing.

5) Boomer is not after my food or blankets in here.

4) I can have a drink in here anytime i see fit.

3) My mom walks around and rocks me all of the time.

2) My dad cant ask me to mow the lawn yet.

and the number one reasons?

1) THIS IS CLEVELAND and winter is about to come.... did i say enough?


with love,
from Little B (care of Nonna G :)

"High Alert"...well, kinda

Its funny how things get as we approach Little B's due date. There's a whole lot of anticipation going on...not just on our part, but also with our friends, family members, and co-workers. It seems as though all of us, with the exception possibly of Little B :), is on "High Alert." For example, when we call someone, we can't just call and not leave a message. In fact, even when we do leave a message, we have to be really careful of the things we say.

On Saturday, I happened to call my mom. Granted, we talk everyday when we're commuting to work...but I usually don't call on a Sat. So, I say "Hi Mom" to her when calling her on Sat and the response I get is "Where are you?" Not the typical "hi" back, that I'd expect. As tempted as I was to give some smart-alleck response back, such as "climbing Mt Kilamajaro" or the ultimate tease "at the hospital"...I told her exactly what I was doing..."running errands." Then I laughed..."Why, am I supposed to be doing something else right now?"....in quite the sarcastic voice.

She wasn't the only one. Mike made some calls to his family on Sunday just to catch up. One of the people he called was his grandmother. He left her a message, which he usually doesn't saying that he was "just calling to catch up and give her some updates....and to give him a ring back when she had a moment." He then called his mom and dad...just to catch up, but wasn't able to reach any of them. Mike's grandmother retrieved his message and thought that maybe, just maybe, Little B was about to make his/her grand entrance. So, she called both Mike's Dad & Mom thinking that maybe it was "time." Mike's Dad then realized that he had a missed call on his cell phone and thought "hmm, maybe she's right" and he called Mike. When Mike's grandmother talked to Mamma G, she said "well, I also got a voicemail from Mike, but didn't get the impression from his voice that something 'big' was going on." She also called Mike, though, just to be sure.

Then today, Collette called and I happened to be in a meeting, so I didn't get her call until 2 hours later. Her message was hilarious-- and quite true. She jokingly (but kinda seriously) said "Um, you're at the point where you aren't allowed to not take my calls...." When I did call her back, the first words out of her mouth were "Um, it took you entirely too much time to call me back...unacceptable." We both laughed.

Family members aren't the only ones who are on "high alert"...so are our friends and co-workers. When I showed up at work today, our Market Manager said "Hey, I'm so happy to see you here." One of my AEs poked her head in my office first thing this morning and said "Good, you're still here. I keep getting scared that you're not going to be here suddenly." Our friends are also being so nice to call and check in on both Mike & I...its really nice. Then, this afternoon, my doctor's office called me to check in. "Kristin, this is Doctor Peskin's office, calling to see how you're feeling and to see if you were noticing any changes....etc." If only Little B would 'call' and say "Hi Mom & Dad, I'm ready to meet you."

So, its funny. We're all on "High Alert," except the little one who really decides when its go time. Here's hoping that Little B hears all the calls and well-wishing comments about how we all can't wait for him/her to arrive and decides that its time to make a move. As Cameron has been saying for months now "That Baby just needs to get here already."

The longest game of "Are We There Yet" ever :)

Its so funny...I remember as a child going on roadtrips, we'd be in the backseat, bored as all get out, annoying the you know what out of our parents because we'd be continuously asking the age old question: "ARE WE THERE YET????!?!?!?!?"

Hmm, fast forward 25 years and the paybacks are a you know what. Now, I'm playing the "Are We There Yet" game with a whole different timeline. Instead of asking this 5 miles into a 3 hour car trip, I find myself asking this on a journey that in all reality, will most likely take 7-14 more days. Suddenly that 3 hour car trip from New Jersey to Maryland feels like a blink.

And its funny...my due date is 4 days away, but as I'm not seeing my doctor until the day after that coveted day, I've already resigned myself to looking past that date I've been looking forward to for, um, about 10 months. I've even contemplated updating the peapod tracker so we don't find the sprout sitting at "Zero Days To Go" for days...we'll see.

The good news is that its finally November, and one thing if certain...Little B is going to arrive sometime this month. Fingers crossed for it to happen well before the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, but even if its close, its still happening....hopefully in the next 10-14 days.

At least I'm not carrying Dumbo

My mom brought up a really great point...and I thought I'd run with it.... as much as I feel these last weeks are "dragging" on like RuPaul, it could be much worse....meaning way longer.

Zebras are pregnant for a year.

Giraffes are pregnant for about 450 days...15 months. Eek. And with those long legs, I can only imagine the types of kicks that expecting mom gets!

Some species of whales are pregnant for 500 days..or about 17 months. At least they don't have ankles that can swell :)

Elephants carry their babies for 19-22 months!

The Frilled Shark also has it pretty rough-- their gestational period is...get this... 3 and a half years! 1260 days! Just imagine what that peapod due date tracker would look like!

Since I was having fun doing research...I also took a look at the animal with the shortest gestational period. Hats off to some of those fun Marsupials, like the opossum, who have the shortest gestational period....12-13 days and then into the pouch they go.

As for Little B at 39 weeks....he/she is about the size of a watermelon and is preparing him/herself for life outside of Hotel W (or at least she/he is supposed to be at least pondering a big exit...hear that, Little B???? Kidding). In preparation, the baby is working on refining reflexes and muscle movements, such as blinking, sucking, inhaling and exhaling. These "practice breathing" acitivites are what cause all the hiccups (which always make me smile and laugh).

Nada.

Had my doctor's appointment this morning-- and it involved the following being said by Dr Peskin: "I'm just the messenger" and then we both laughed. Really, that's all we can do. Little B is apparently LOVING life in Club Med (a.k.a. Hotel W). He/she is loving it so much that there have been absolutely no attempts to check out....not even a call to the front desk asking for his/her bags to be brought around. In fact, if a call was made to the concierge at the front desk, it was to inquire about upgrading to a pent house and extending his/her stay for a few more.....WEEKS!

Enough with the figurative speech....what I'm saying is that there was absolutely no change since my last appointment. Nothing. Not a single physical thing. Nada. Nil. Zilch. Zero. Zip. (see where I'm going with this??? :) The only thing that has changed is my level of feeling uncomfortable and the frequency of nights that I spend awake for long durations because I can't get comfortable. Both of those factors have increased. For example, last night I was up from 2:50a til about 5a. Nice. Then, I'm supposed to try to function at work on not much sleep at all. Ugh. I'm now officially crabby.

Meanwhile, the good kind of changes-- the ones that suggest that Little B might arrive sometime soon, they're all on pause. In fact, my next doctor's appointment isn't even scheduled until the day AFTER my due date. Bummer. Keep in mind though that this is b/c Dr Peskin will be out of town until next Wed, so on one hand this is good news. But, well, its just that I'm at the point now when I'm sick of waiting. I was hoping for just a little progress.

But, its totally out of my control. Little B will do as he/she wants to do....at least while in Hotel W. And if that means she/he wants to hang out in Hotel W for longer than I'd personally like, well, that's what'll happen. I have a sinking feeling that I am going to be the "Stuffed Bird @ Thanksgiving." They really don't want to do anything to artificially induce me if they can avoid it b/c of my history, so, we're pretty much on Little B's time table (or the C-Section route, which I don't want to even think about...so we're not going to unless we have to)

Okay, I vented. Time to focus on the positives-- Baby is doing fine. Heartbeat is good. They're in the right position-- another positive. And, I was looking forward to a quiet Thanksgiving...which I may just get in the hospital. We'll figure it out as we go :)

The Big Vote....

Awhile ago, Nonna G (Mike's Mom) mentioned something in an email about the significance of today, Election Day. She said "by the time the Little B is born, we'll have done something amazing as a country. Either we will have elected the first African American to be president or the first female to be Vice President." This is so true, and in many ways, no matter what happens as the last ballot gets counted, this is truly monumental and significant. I'm proud to be a citizen of a country that is about to do one of these two things--- "we've come a long way, baby."

I don't want to make this post about my personal political views. Those of you close to me know where I stand as we've had conversations about it and that's that. I don't want this site to be a place of political debate, but would rather choose to focus on how fortunate we are to be in a country where we have the right to vote, as many people thoughout the years have faught, both physically and intellectually, for us to have it. I'm proud of everyone who has chosen to have their own voice be heard today by voting. We'll see how it turns out.

Moving on from national news to personal baby news...
Tomorrow is my next weekly doctors appointment. Last week, when discussing how the baby was progressing in terms of "decent," Dr Peskin said "Baby is locked in there pretty well....I'll be seeing you next week for sure." I then replied "How locked? Are we saying there's a door that has a deadbolt lock, a padlock, a good security code on it?" And his response was "Pretty much all of the above, but that's good...remember you were concerned about this baby coming while I was out of town? Well, I don't think you have to worry about that." So, yes, that was reassuring in the short term. The reason my appointment is tomorrow is because he's out of town from Thursday-Monday and he wanted to check me out before he left....just in case. But, I'm not feeling much different than I did last week. Except for a bigger belly, more bathroom breaks, and the emergence of a little penguin waddle...I don't feel any different. Maybe Little B will surprise us.

So, the grand master peapod tracker says 10 more days...

That would be very cool. I would love to meet Little B in 10 days. I do still, however, think that meeting will occur a bit later. Call it "mother-to-be's intuition," but I think I have at least 2 more weeks left. Perhaps Little B will surprise both me and my doctor and be right on time....I guess anything could happen. If you look at the research, my "hunch" has even more validity. Only 5% of births occur on a baby's actual due date. 80% of babies are born between 2 weeks of their due date, with 35% of all babies being born between Week 40-41, and and the rest being evenly distributed between Wks 39-40 and Wks 41-42. Its like a little bell curve. I suppose this is why, from the very beginning, the magical due date that you meaure just about everything on, is referred to medically as your "EDD: Estimated Due Date." So, we'll wait to see where we end up.

Regardless of whether or not Little B will arrive in 10 days, today was a great day. My team at work threw a surprise baby shower today for me. I had no idea...in fact, when one of them asked me to "go on a walk with them" (which was their clever way of getting me into the conference room), I was a little concerned that something was terribly wrong with her. Boy, was I off. Turns out she's a fantastic actress. And, as I already knew, they're quite a thoughtful group. It was really nice of them-- especially with how busy work has been as of late. They had a "holiday theme" with their gift--- and Little B is going to be all decked out for Thanksgiving & Christmas...and winter in general. I can't wait to see him or her in them.

We're not very good at "taking it easy"

Remember a few weekends ago when I mentioned that "we wouldn't be doing anymore road trps out of town so that we could rest and relax at home? Well, I was right about something- we haven't been travelling out of town. However, I think we've discovered something about ourselves-- we're not really good at getting R&R. Turns out, I still have a lot of energy (granted it comes and goes) so we haven't really mastered the "relaxing" part.

At my doctors appointment on Friday, I came to the revelation that Little B is going to be awhile. In fact, when I look at the peapod ticker, I have a sinking feeling that its going to hit "0 Days to Go" and stay there-- for at least a week before we welcome Little B into the world. I'm actually, kinda, more okay with this than I thought I'd be. If, indeed, Little B is "quite comfortable where he/she is," I'm okay with it* (*=unless its Thanksgiving and Little B isn't here yet-- then I'm not gonna be a happy camper). My doctor said that I can keep my activity level up as much as possible, as sometimes this helps initiate labor. So, we decided to load up our schedule this weekend, even if we were in town.

On Friday night, we went to our friends Andy & Jenn's house to watch Hannah go trick-or-treating and hang out with them for the evening. We had a great time just catching up, remembering old times, and spending time with Hannah, who is now a little over a year old. By the way, Hannah may have been the cutest monkey ever for Halloween. I can't wait for a few years into the future when our child is playing with theirs...it'll be really nice. We've been friends with them for a long time...both moving up from Cincinnati to Cleveland at about the same time as Andy & Mike met eachother through work. Over time, our friendship has really grown-- and its just a wonderful thing. Jenn, as well as my other friends who are moms, has been such a great source of advice and support. We're quite lucky.

Then, on Saturday, we ran a bunch of errands, went out to lunch, cleaned the house, did the rest of Little B's laundry (so the 0-3 month clothes are all ready to go) and then took a nap. That night, we picked up another couple that Mike works with and went to a Halloween Party about an hour away at a coworkers home. It was really nice to get out and spend time with some of the people that Mike works with-- and their spouses too. We came home at about 11:30 (which is a late night for me:). Kevin, Collette, Calvin & Cameron (along with their dogs) were already at our house when we got home. They came up to spend today with us....one last weekend to spend time together before our newest edition arrives.

This morning, we all woke up pretty early, the dogs went to the park, we played Wii, and then Calvin & Collette went to the Browns/Ravens game. While they went to the game, Mike took Cameron out to a special breakfast and Kevin & I went to have a nice "Brother/Sister Celebratory Breakfast by ourselves. It was a really great morning. We talked about how cool it was that Mike & I were about to embark on parenthood. He and Collette have been some of our closest confidants throughout all of the tests, and planning, and, well, the entire process that has gotten us to this wonderful milestone. He and I sat across the table from eachother and said just about the same thing at the same time: "Can't believe this day is so close." In some ways, its seems like a long journey, but on the other hand, it seems like its moved by. At just about this time last year (I believe it was late October), we were really entering the process of finding "Team Stork," (including the right groups of doctors and specialists, a donor agency that we felt very comfortable with, and the ideal donor for us). Now, a year later, we're just about to realize the result that we were seeking. Its only a few weeks away.

After breakfast, we met up with Mike & Cameron back at the house. Kev & Mike huddled to watch football and Cameron & I went off to have the 1st annual "Goddaughter Appreciation Afternoon." We went to the Painted Penguin and painted figurines for Cameron to give to family at Christmas. Then, we got hot cocoa and walked through the mall. We found some books that Cameron thought Little B would like and purchased the ones that were on sale. Then, we found some new Webkinz....one for Cameron, one for Calvin and then Cameron found the alligator that her mom REALLY wanted. Lets just say that Cameron has a very bright future in sales-- they all came home with us. Then, we went back to the art store to pick up the 8 figures that we painted together. They all turned out just great and will surely be hits at the holidays. Cam was super appreciative of everything...thanking me many times. She even said "I'm really glad I have aunts and uncles--- you're so good to me"

I'm really thankful that Kevin & Collette made the decision to move back to Ohio last year. When they were living in other states, we only were able to see them and the kids once or twice a year. Now, we see them almost every month-- sometimes multiple times in a month. Its just, flat-out nice to have them an hour and forty-five minutes away. And I'm thinking this is only going to get better once Little B gets here

So, yes, we were in town this weekend, but we didn't at all take it easy. We made the most of the time we had with friends and family (even the extra hour we got for daylight savings). There will be plenty of time to take it easy...and I am following my body's cues...they all just happened to point to "lets do this ________ (insert 18 activities here)" this weekend. I am relaxing with my feet up on the couch now.....does that count for R&R?!?!?